has been really annoying again. It started
with me not being ready for school
even though I had
to prepare (apparently that’s why the best time to buy
Back to School is
Before School Even Stopped Last Term)
and I wasn’t even ready.
I would say I was.
I had done a special project on Rome
I had tried fourteen new foods and that is
Actually A Record for me
in one summer.
My shoes still fit because they were from last June
but I didn’t clean them
so that wasn’t good enough
and I have the main bits in my pencil case
because I don’t think anyone ever uses the triangle things
(or very much anyway)
and I can ask if I need
Mum was annoying in the summer too in fact.
I also had to go to lots of Places
even though I didn’t want to
so I am rather tired
National Trust gift shops
Museums where the buttons don’t work
sitting through concerts
(especially if they are Good For Me)
but going to the cinema was ok.
This week though
that I have a hair cut
and stood and watched and it was
(she always wins on the things I care about most)
I had to go and cry after that.
Then there were the Mandarin lessons after school in this club,
which I said I’d only do if I could join the football team
and have a drone
and a smart phone
and she thought she was being funny so instead she bought
I hadn’t seen one since I was
learning the alphabet
and even that was only a picture.
Turns out the metal ones
aren’t even proper
they have to be
soft, singing wood
laid out ready
“would you like a go?”
I wanted a go of course
(I don’t want lessons
Mum had other plans
(On most days there are things I have to do:
gymnastics, swimming, dance or Tae Kwon Do,
and also we’re rehearsing for a show.)
She found a slot.
I told her I was tired, that I have enough, I
already want to stop.
She found a teacher.
How does she do it?
The teacher has the face of a hamster
but you would not believe the speed she can play at.
If hamsters played the xylophone they’d be pretty fast
have you ever seen them in a wheel?
She was faster.
if I work hard I could get on to Young Musician of the Year.
I haven’t even got the right sticks yet.
Actually one is right,
one is left,
that’s the kind of thing my dad would say
but he keeps quiet on these sorts of things.
So every day this week, I get home, shoes off,
“Have You Done Your Xylophone Practice?”